Monday, July 16, 2012

Dang it, I'm Cures!

Sent: Monday, July 16, 2012 3:59:41 PM
Subject: "Dang it...I'm a curse."

Oh hey :)
Okay, so the subject title. EVERY single time I call someone...THEY NEVER ANSWER! Whether it's our investigators, a member of the ward, or when I'm in the teaching center (not called call center anymore). Also, it's the same for knocking doors which...I'll admit I sometimes slightly love because since I'm no where near confident in my Spanish...I get away with it every time :) I know, bad. BUT! Maybe Heavenly Father is giving me a little break? Anyways, my companion laughs because it's the complete opposite for her :) Thank you for the letters I got this week!: Elder Vance, Elder Petersen, Elder Reid, and Chrissy soon to be York! :) Hermana Marroquin, Mommy, and Chrissy (LOVED IT!). They always make my P-days! Also, I can't remember if I said thanks to Elder Reid last week or not but...THANKS! :) And Madz... I think I wrote you back like, 1 or 2 P-days ago...for some reason I didn't have your name crossed as letters I wrote but...I'm pretty positive I wrote you back asap. So, just write me back ;) And VERONICA! I FINALLY WROTE A LETTER FOR YOU!...2 months later...haha but look out for it! Mama Fife, thank you for your sweet note! It brought tears to my eyes! You are the best! Oh and RAINED the other nigh! Okay, not like legit rain but it was so weird! Rain in July in L.A.?....unheard of. 
Embarrassing story of the week: We gave a tour to this AMAZING family that I know will one day get baptized. The Elders called in to have sisters take them so we had the privilege of doing so. So, we are in front of the Christus and I start talking about Jesus Christ. I told these investigators, "Jesus Christ lived a sinfull life..." and I HAD NO IDEA!...until Sister Cole kept randomly whispering "sinless, sinless, SINLESS!". It was then that I realized and paused, corrected myself, gave an awkward laugh, and then continued. Luckily they are better in spanish then they were in english but insisted doing an english tour soooo I don't think they really caught the mistake thank goodness :)

This week we were SPOILED with huge member meals! We had three and haha I had to of gained like 20 pounds because they fed us SO MUCH! It was gross haha but, surprisingly, I have finally learned how to eat more then a few bites :) It helps a lot because then Sister Cole doesn't have to eat everything and I just sit there. But my goodness, it was crazy! We sang for Hermana Gutierez (she feeds us every.single.week.) and she cried, so precious! The spirit was so strong and it really was a testimony reminder for me that hey, if I can't speak well in Spanish yet, at least I can sing in it!

So, this week has been good and bad. Zach, our baptismal date investigator dropped us this past week :( He couldn't change who he is in order to live the law of chastity and he just stopped returning our calls. He finally texted us though and told us he wants to stay on the spiritual path that he's on but the last legitimate conversation we had with him he did thank us for helping him come closer to Christ and knowing who God is. We got DUMPED over text!! Haha probably shouldn't of laughed at that but, when we got the text we were helplessly waiting outside the back of the VC for our ride and had just had a long day and then we FINALLY heard from it and! was over a text. As hard as it was to see him let us go, I know that he did change during the time we were able to meet with him. I wouldn't be surprise if later on down the road he calls our number again and meets new sister missionaries and they will be the ones who will baptize him into the church! Our other investigator, Leo (16), loved youth conference this past week soooo much that he wanted to get baptized earlier! So we are having his baptism this Sunday! 6 days! It was really cool because we had a lesson with him last night at a families house in the ward and his mom came! We've heard from the progress record notes that she has some what of an 'interest' in the church. She asked some good questions and the hermana and hermana Frausto answered them perfectly! It was a great experience because Leo now knows another family in the ward (because the one fellow-shipping him leaves for mexico to stay for a few years on the 31st of this month), his mom was able to know the people living directly above them, we strengthened our relationship with the Frausto's and his mom was able to get to meet us! His mom expressed how she was really happy for him and his decision to be baptized and she knew that he was making the right choice for himself. She started to cry while expressing her gratitude to him and he in return started to cry as well. The spirit was so strong during that lesson! We also had a lesson with Edvin (29) and it went really good! He told us that he KNOWS the church is true! But, the issue is that he is living with his "wife" aka girlfriend because they aren't married and it's difficult for him to just drop it and move on from her. It's so hard because he told us for the first time that he KNOWS the church is true and that the Book of Mormon is true! Ugh...oh Edvin. We'll get him to commit soon, I just know it.

My challenge this week has been that I feel like I need to re-strengthen my testimony in everything that I once felt like I had a strong testimony of! I know, sounds exhausting but, let me explain. When the missionaries taught me, the ONLY thing I had a hard time gaining a testimony of was that Joseph Smith was a Prophet of God and having a testimony of a modern-day prophet. Everything else just naturally felt right and true and I never had to really work to gain a testimony of it. But, when it comes to lessons I don't have the drive or the desire to go in depth with them and I don't have the concern of making sure we touch every point because silly old me just assumes that everyone thinks the same as me lol when they don't. I assume that oh, as long as you say what it is your teaching, share a few points, they'll know it's true because that literally is how it was for me! I need to remember that it takes longer for others to really gain a testimony in something. It takes longer for the plan of salvation to really 'click' in someones mind. So, I started to make a little journal where I am going to write out my testimony of every single point taught in the first 4 lessons of PMG but REALLY ponder and think about each point and re-evaluate my testimony of it. If I feel like I don't have a strong testimony of it yet, I have to wait til I feel like it's there and then I'll write it because I'm going in order. I feel like it will help me a lot. I thought of it myself and haha I can see it already working! The first point that we teach any person is that God is our Loving Heavenly Father. I sat and pondered at the sentence for a while a few days ago and asked myself, "Do I REALLY think God is my loving Heavenly Father? That I'm REALLY a child of God?" I decided that I wasn't ready to write my testimony of it because I wanted to be COMPLETELY, EXACTLY, 100% SURE...until later Alma 30:44 kept coming to my mind which reads,
"But Alma said unto him: Thou hast had signs enough; will ye tempt your God? Will ye say, Show unto me a sign, when ye have the testimony of aall these thy brethren, and also all the holy prophets? The scriptures are laid before thee, yea, and all things denote there is a God; yea, even the bearth, and call things that are upon the face of it, yea, and its dmotion, yea, and also all the eplanets which move in their regular form do witness that there is a Supreme Creator."
So THEN I thought to myself, "Oh no...I'm tempting GOD!" haha. And then I wrote my testimony of how I know that there is a God and that he truly is my Heavenly Father and how He really does know me better then I know myself and that if I trust in him and his plan, I'll be okay :) It was a good wake up call lets just leave it as that.

Well, this week will be long, hard, and busy! Sister Cole and I have no studies at all this week :( Well, we have companionship but no personal or language. So, I made a goal to read out of my spanish book of mormon EVERY day because well...lets be honest, I need it. But I am so excited for Leo's baptism! He has NO idea of the impact this decision will make on not only his life, but his childrens life and their childrens life! Ohhh I cannot wait for him! Before I felt like I would have mix feelings about it, that because I didn't find him and teach him from the beginning and because I'm not super connected to him (neither Sister Cole or I) that it wouldn't be the same experience. But, after the lesson we had yesterday, I just love the kid! I now feel a part of it and just hope for the best for him! This hymn as touched my heart this week. Like I say every week haha the mission is hard! But, from the beginning, I was willing to go wherever the Lord wanted me to go. I was willing to speak whatever langauge the Lord wanted me to speak. I was willing to do everything. Why the sudden change? I STILL need to be willing to do whatever it is the Lord asks of me without complaining and especially without thinking that I'm not capable of doing it. Read the lyrics and relate it to your lives: are you willing to be what the Lord wants you to be? I know I've been practicing this every single day since I've been here! I love you all! I know the church is true and that the gate is OPENED and is WAITING for others to enter. Oh how great the day will be when we can all be with our Heavenly Father again.

1. It may not be on the mountain height
Or over the stormy sea,
It may not be at the battle痴 front
My Lord will have need of me.
But if, by a still, small voice he calls
To paths that I do not know,
I値l answer, dear Lord, with my hand in thine:
I値l go where you want me to go.
I値l go where you want me to go, dear Lord,
Over mountain or plain or sea;
I値l say what you want me to say, dear Lord;
I値l be what you want me to be.
2. Perhaps today there are loving words
Which Jesus would have me speak;
There may be now in the paths of sin
Some wand池er whom I should seek.
O Savior, if thou wilt be my guide,
Tho dark and rugged the way,
My voice shall echo the message sweet:
I値l say what you want me to say.
3. There痴 surely somewhere a lowly place
In earth痴 harvest fields so wide
Where I may labor through life痴 short day
For Jesus, the Crucified.
So trusting my all to thy tender care,
And knowing thou lovest me,
I値l do thy will with a heart sincere:
I値l be what you want me to be.

Hermana Baeza

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