Monday, August 13, 2012

Subject: I think I burned my esophagus..





Can I just say that I have the BEST family and friends?
THIS WEEK WAS GREAT! Hard...but great :) Thank you for the letters I got this week...Abby (the email, LOVED!), Elder Petersen, The Hiltons (LOVED the pictures! Adorable!!) Ryan Berckmoes, Hermana Marroquin, Emily Hansen (WEIRD! No more a Jenson...) Elder Reid, Mommy, and Elder Vance (thanks for the letter and the package!! You da best.)....yeah, I got A LOT this week haha I loved it!! :) I saw two people this week during the visitors center, Karlie Kenyon who came and saw me last week but I was off shift and I was able to catch this week by random surprise and then Dave Bean which was definitely a walk down memory lane. It's crazy to think of the people I've seen since I've been here, some I would of never expected! Again...the joy of living in the same state haha. Oh, hey Richie. Did you delete all of my church music from my computer? I hope not...since that's the only type of music you can listen to on your mission lol. Oh, and I know you said you wanted to bring your ipod...don't. It's kind of pointless because you'll only listen to it morning and before bed. Well, I guess you could but then you would have to bring an iHome? So, I would just bring CD's and hope that your trainer has a cd-player like most apts here do. Plus, you can't listen to your own music at the MTC. But...if you haven't deleted my church songs....can you burn them on a CD to me and send them?? I think I have a playlist of church hymns...if you could do that...that would be awesome. YOU REPORT TO THE MTC IN LESS THEN 2 WEEKS! Get pumped! Oh yeah and yesterday was my half birthday haha and so the other sisters we live with made me my FAVORITE dessert! Hello Dollies :) They are the best. Oh yeah, and I took my pill right before I went to bed and woke up with my throat burning and hurting...then the next day it hurt to eat...but it's getting better....don't worry about it :) But really, I think I just burned it and it's like 95% healed now and doesn't hurt but haha I learned my lesson!: take the pill and DON'T lay down for 10 minutes.. :)

So, this week I'm going to write what is literally written in my journal because...I always never seem to have enough time to write everything. This explains the good and the bad of this week so... enjoy :)

August 2nd, 2012
"Hermana Cole and I got split up towards the middle of our shift when I needed to go to the bathroom to wash my hands and a Spanish tour came in so she decided to take it with another sister. I then decided to be with Sister Kim instead of going somewhere and sitting alone. A boy named Jared came to visited the VC today while his dad was in the temple? He seemed a little off and walked with this cute little limp. He told us that he was a member and that he wanted a tour. Sister Kim and I showed him the Book of Mormon pods and watched the Faith clip.; It was then when he told us that the Book of Mormon has helped him through his trials and especially when people would make fun of him at school. it made me so sad that people would make fun of him. After the Book of Mormon pods we suggested that he could watch a movie because his dad was going to be there for about 2 hours. Sister Kim brought up the movie about Thoams S. Monson that I felt was so perfect! He watched it ans said how he learned so much more about him and the faith he had his whole life. We then took him to Special Witnesses where Sister Kim showed him the testimony of Elder Hales about having faith in Christ which was so powerful. Then we showed him the talk by Elder Uchtdorf and while I was watching it, I was getting so mad at the people who would make fun of him and push him into the lockers. Then...this thought came to my mind: Just because YOU don't push people into lockers doesn't mean that gossiping isn't just as bad. I learned a lot from Jared and Sister Kim today. Then we had our lesson with Edvin which we've been planning all week to make it this hardcore lesson that would make him WANT to be baptized. I was nervous about it all day because well, I didn't know how to be bold in Spanish or let alone know what to say. When the lesson started I said nothing. I was only able to understand a few parts but I had no idea what to say. I wanted to help him so badly but didn't know how! At the end of the lesson, Hermana Cole finally looked at me and I shared something that had been on my mind for about 5ish minutes. I talked about an experience that Elder Andersen (one of our 12 apostles today) and when he was deciding whether to serve a mission or not. The answer he got was, 'You don't know everything, but you know enough.' I then shared my testimony to him that he NEEDS to pray! I wanted to cry  as I was talking but I didn't let myself...until I stopped talking haha. I couldn't really hear what was going on because I was crying but when I finished talking Edvin apparently said, 'See, she can speak Spanish! She spoke everything perfectly!' Then Hermana Olivarez explained that it's hard for them to learn Spanish just like it's hard for us to learn English but with the Spirit, they can do it...you can tell she has a strong testimony of her Savior. It was really nice what Hermano Olivarez said about me. When we got to the car I just bawled my eyes out telling Hermana Cole how I don't want to train Spanish and how I'm scared to do it. We're pretty positive one of us will stay and train and ugh, I just can't do ti! I can't even hold a conversation in Spanish! If I'm asked to train I'll obviously accept it but I just know that I'm not ready to do it in Spanish. It's time for bed...I love my mission."

August 5th, 2012
"...Today was hard but for different reasons. We taught Emilio and he apparently shared this crazy experience that I had no idea about because well...I had no idea what was going on lol. I guess when we first assigned the Introduction of the Book of Mormon to him, he imagiend himsefl and pictured himself being baptized as he was reading it! he feels like he needs to be baptized but he just wants to know more and make sure. He wants what's going to be best for his family and I promised him that this IS it! We set a date for October 14th but...it will happen sooner :) However...I had zero excitement for his experience and baptismal date. i was so frustrated in the car when Hermana Cole was telling me about what just happened and the excitement of it because I didn't understand what he was saying. I felt like because I had no idea what was going on that I couldn't be happy. I  was being incredibly selfish and prideful. I then thought about my parents. I remembered when they decided to be baptized I had no feelings about it. i felt like it was sincere. It wasn't until i talked to each of them individually about why they wanted to be baptized and without even knowing it they were both bearing their testimony to me. I couldn't accept their testimony before those conversations because I never knew they had one and now I'm doing the same thing for Emlio...I AM SUCH A BRAT! But, I quickly realized my frustrations and resolved it. I eventually told Hermana Cole about it because I felt like she needed to know why I was frustrated..."

Those were really hard for me to write because well haha my journal is very personal! But, I learned a lot this week. Everyone has been telling me I'm going to train next transfer and that has give me anxiety. I realized from my breakdown after Edvin's lesson that I need to work harder! I need to read my scriptures even more, study spanish more, etc. What I learned from Emilio yesterday was that...I need to stop thinking about myself. Who cares if I don't understand him! The man wants to be baptized and I chose to be selfish and not be excited about it on the way home! Like, really? I'm embarrassed by that! But, it taught me a lot about being humble and reminded me that I have soooo much more growing to do. You would THINK that I should know all of these things but haha I'm constantly being reminded that missionaries are far from being perfect :)

Leo blessed the sacrament yesterday!!! It was cute because before he blessed it, we made eye contact and smiled at each other :) Then, after he blessed it, he eventually looked over towards me and I gave him a thumbs up and he just laughed to himself...haha I love embarrassing that boy! When he goes on his mission, I WILL be there for his farewell talk!!! FOR SURE!

There was a quote that Madz Vance shared to me that she heard from an Elder in her ward who just got home from his mission. It's something that his mission president said, "We do not go on missions to enjoy success, but to learn to overcome disappointment." HOW TRUE IS THAT! Another quote I found this week from Elder Holland was, "I don’t know what mission you will serve in, but I don’t believe our Father in Heaven has made any particular promises to your mission as a mission. I do know He has made great promises to you personally." I know that the Lord has called me specifically to this work. I know that He gives me certain tasks and challenges because He knows I can fulfill them. He would never give me something that went beyond my limits because with Him, I can anything. I love being a missionary. I love the people I get to meet, the stories I get to hear and the lives I get to influence. Yesterday we gave a tour and I couldn't believe half of the stuff that was coming out of my mouth. I could of never said any of that at him! But...it's because the Lord promises to be there when we are teaching his children. He promises to help us say particular things in order to help his children come closer to him. This work is powerful...and I am so grateful to be a part of it. I love being a missionary!! I love you all!!!!


Love,
Hermana Baeza

P.S. - EVERYONE WATCH THIS!! It's amazing...so good! https://www.lds.org/youth/video/stay-within-the-lines?lang=eng


1. love when members bring food!
2. totally cheesin' it up
3. hermana hildalgo and i!

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