Hello everyone!! :)
Thank
you Elder Petersen, Sean Hurley, Elder Reid, mommy and the Williams
family (Parker's fam) and Sister Tukuafu for the little notes you left
me when you came to the VC! It's weird to be back. I also saw Sara and
Anthony on Sunday haha! That's what happens when I come back to the
VC...I start to see everyone I know again. Sara is from Danville and
she's in my new ward! And also in my area!!! Hopefully I'll go over for
at least one dinner appointment ;)
This email is going to be shorter because well...I'm back at
the VC so there is less to write about. HOWEVER! Lets start from day
one.
Day 1: horrible. absolutely miserable! I didn't think
coming back would be so hard. I just didn't know what to do with
myself...I forgot everything! i just felt useless. it didn't help that
my companion could sense that i didn't want to be there. everyone was so
nice to me too...which made it worse quite frankly. everyone asked if i
was happy to be back and i would just give them the fakest smile haha! i
even cried to sister shakespear at the front desk - what's the point of
crying in private, right? oh man, i struggled big time.
Day 2: better. or so i thought. i was just a hot mess again that day
to my new companion. i felt really bad because i got the feeling that
she felt that i didn't want to be with her. she knew how much i loved
being in the field and she just felt like i didn't care to come back to
the vc or with her. i felt so bad. that night i decided that i needed to
change my attitude and just accept this change. for my companions sake
and for the area's sake.
Day 3: better. i learned great things from district meeting and was able to get some referrals.
Day
4: 50 minutes late to our first dinner appointment...no big deal. we
mixed up in the time. we did have a lesson with a member present so that
was success!
Day 5: such a great day. we gave a tour for some 18 year old
boys deciding on when to go on their missions. the spirit was soooo
strong! we also visited a former investigator and she told us to come
back!! we also met with a family and really got to know them. we tried
so hard to teach people but no one was home.
I know that I sound like such a downer but I just really am
struggling this week. My tender mercies was finding out that two people
that I've taught over the phone have been BAPTIZED! The one that I
really taught was Dylan. He was the very last tour I gave at the VC
before I went out to the field back in March. I had taught him over the
phone a few times and the member who gave me the referral decided to
bring him in the VC so I could meet him and teach him in person. It was
such a spiritual tour and lesson. My first day back one of the sisters
told me he got baptized and I freaked out! I called him and when I told
him was me he just gasped super loud haha and was so excited to talk to
me! Then I called Andrew, the member who referred him, and he too had
the same reaction: gasp and excitement! They are planning on coming
tomorrow so I can see them one last time before I leave! Dylan is
awesome and already has a calling with the young men!
So, this is how Sister Baeza feels:
I just feel so
lost. It's not like I don't know what to do with my time or how to use
it, I just don't understand why I would be opening up a new area my last
transfer and especially as a VC sister. We average about 2-3 nights in
our area a WEEK...we can't teach 15-20 lessons with a schedule like
that! I came from having the most success on my mission to an area where
we really have no investigators and I'll only go to church 2 or 3 more
times just because of our schedule. My companion told me our first night
how she was intimidated by me. She told me how amazing I was and how
great everyone thinks I am. I just feel stressed living up to others
expectations with me and I really what, only have 5 more weeks to do
this all? I feel like I have to get everything done and perfect before I
leave so I don't leave my companion with still an empty area. It's just
so stressful! However, I received personal revelation today as I was
attempting to take a nap...
I truly feel like this is Heavenly Father preparing me for
when I come home. The feelings that I've been feeling this week are only
going to DOUBLE, or even triple when I go home. Heavenly Father doesn't
expect me to have "everything done" when I leave this area because it's
still going to continue after I leave. I just need to work my hardest,
stay focus, follow the spirit, and all will work out. Something that
President Weidman said to me in my email from him was, 'I feel that the
Lord has a work for you this transfer that only you can do." I just need
to keep remembering that.
I love you all so much! I hope you all have a wonderful week!!! I know next week will be better... :)
Love,
Hermana Baeza
the one in the purple is my companion! sister quinonez!!
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